Rubber gloves required...or not!

Yesterday I was privileged enough to visit a young friend and her newborn son. I didn't have to be invited twice! I love babies! I was extremely eager to take the trip to Bolingbrook to see the brand new Adventist Hospital, the new mom and her brand spanking new, not even 24 hr. old, baby son. I couldn't get there fast enough. Even his precious name, Lucas Sean, was cute as a button and was a healthy boy, weighing in at a healthy nine pounds, I could almost smell him. There is something about the smell of a newborn. I can almost feel my own babies in my arms, if I try really hard. Mothers never forget those things! Even though it has been a very, very long time; I do remember those tiny blankets of joy weighing 5# 13 oz. and 6# 12oz. That was the memory that brought me eagerly up to Bolingbrook yesterday.

I suddenly remember how careful I had to be 36 yrs ago when I had to leave my daughter in the hospital for a few extra days. Every time I went back to the hospital to feed her, I had to scrub and put on a gown over my street clothes. They were very restrictive with visitors; but moms and dads could come to visit their child if they wore the proper attire. Gloves were a must, along with the gowns. Baby had to wear hospital issued sleepwear. It was a one piece drawstring bottom nightgown with hand coverings. Even the blankets were hospital issued. Blue for boys and pink for little girls; that is how it was back in the day. One more thing, the babies were swaddled. When the nurse brought your baby to you, you might be able to see its little face and that's about all. How many mothers when the nurse left would remove layer after layer to count fingers and toes? Yep, all there and accounted for.

So, noting that things are really restrictive now; I was worried that since I wasn't even a blood relative, things may be even tighter when it came to seeing Lucas. Maybe we wouldn't even be able to visit. I certainly didn't want to get my hopes up that I would be able to hold a child that wasn't even 1 day old. I imagined that even if that was a possibility, we would have to scrub up, take off this, put on that, jump through hoops and pay dearly to even get near the child. After all, the mailman wears rubber gloves to deliver junk mail and my grandson has to pass three check points daily to go to high school.

So, park the car. No handicapped spaces available. Seems like that's happening more and more these days. As the baby-boomers get older; we may have parking lots that have a few designated spots for people who are NOT disabled. Anyway, in we go and guess what? Other then obtaining a "Visitor's Pass" which we were told to put somewhere within view we were simply directed to the 4th floor. Up we go, through the swinging doors and into my friends private room. She and her new son sat there watching television as if we were visiting her home. No special garb, no washing, no sterile gloves; none of these were needed. The only monitoring device was a little tag on the little baby boy's foot. It looked like something that you would see on an expensive piece of clothing in a department store. "You can't shoplift a baby", Jerry stated. I was flabbergasted. "Wait a minute! The postman handles our junk mail with rubber gloves, but we don't need to follow any precautions to handle a newborn. Don't you find that absurd?"

Florida Vacation Part 2

Reaching Georgia the first day was just as we had planned. Being with dogs was a bit of a challenge when it came to finding a suitable motel. Only certain motels advertise as being "Dog-friendly". Motel 8 is one such motel. So I had made advance reservations. I can be very impromptu and spontaneous; but after driving more than six hundred miles the first day, I wanted the assurance that I would have a place to lay my head without hearing two lonely dogs crying in the car. We had planned all along with our tight budget to only get one room with two beds. When you've lived in the same house with each other and "camped" out in tiny spaces, you learn how to be modest and discreet with each other. So we were very at-home and comfortable with the four of us sharing one room. Even the dogs know their place!

Our motel was just North of Atlanta, but before I realized, we had driven about 30 miles South of Atlanta. That should have been a sign to us and we should have just stopped there for the night. Instead, we decided to turn back and go to the motel which had my credit card information. I was really afraid that if we didn't show up that they would deduct the night's stay. I didn't feel like playing the "Do you allow dogs?" game that late at night either. So turn around we did and got lost in the process. After actually getting Steve to ask for directions; we went the back roads and pulled into the Motel 8 around 9 O'clock. Check in was a snap, but we discovered that the pet fee that they impose is per dog. It's expensive to take your dog on vacation!


We went into the room and were appalled by the fact that it certainly was not the Ritz. Cleanliness was not up to par and eek! it only had one king bed. At this point, we weren't going to start looking for other arrangements. Steve, always the gentleman offered to pull his sleeping bag from the car and sleep on the floor. "Nonsense! I said, "We can be mature here and improvise." So we built a wall in the middle of the bed with luggage and pillows. Once I take my medication that helps relax my spastic muscles, I could sleep through a tornado! Therefore, I was surprised when I heard Steve loudly ask "What do you want?" Apparently, there had been a quiet knock on the door. A knock that was so quiet that unless you were already awake, you wouldn't hear it. Steve's response to the quiet tap at the door sent the man into panic mode. He turned white as a ghost (which wasn't easy)and started stammering. According to Steve, the light tap on the door was just enough to gauge whether someone was alert in the room. I guess that all the yelling and screaming that we had hear previous to this had just been a preview of the "bad" part of town that we had found ourselves in. "You really think that they were going to either break into the van or steal your Bike?" I asked. Well, Steve was convinced and I do imagine that that man will not soon forget the scary image of the big, burly, bearded man who threw open the curtains! He may even be running today!

We didn't even take Motel 8's offer of a free Continental breakfast. Nothing we wanted to eat from there. So we packed the car to travel the next six hundred miles to Port Charlotte. As we left the motel parking lot, we noticed that one whole side of the motel was burned. Hmmm, lesson to be learned; never pull into an unknown area after dark. It's much better to actually see what you're getting into!

Love, the Great Commandment

I always thought that if you loved someone enough, you could change their ways. Idealistic as it may seem, I was convinced that "all you need is love". If you gave enough love to someone or something, you could move them to do the right thing, make better choices and turn them from despair to productivity and self-love. I am now ready to tell you (and myself)that unfortunately this is not necessarily true. It may have taken awhile, but I am now ready to admit that it can take all the love that you can muster up and you still might not be loved in return, turn people around or change their situation. I can also assure you that although it may baffle and confuse you, you have not wasted your time.

Rather disheartened, I sit here and admit that there are two types of people in this world. There are givers and there are takers! Without both types of people, the world in which we live in today would be a strange place. I find at times, following in Jesus' footsteps becomes more difficult as your faith grows and develops. At one time, I thought that being a "lover" of mankind was what God called His followers to do. Empty oneself for another, give your best, turn the other cheek so to speak; all these things could and would change the world. Let it be known that my years of "rollingaround" have taught me that even though one may love, it doesn't have its guarantee that #1 You will be loved in return; or #2 It is going to change someone or something the way YOU think it should be.

Well, aren't you little Miss Sunshine?" I'm sure that's what you are thinking. Just being realistic, I assure you. Actually, in the past, I thought that like the song says, "All you need is love." If you loved with all your heart, that that love would bring out the best in those around you. So knock yourself out, but guess what? There are some people who are unable to love. I do believe that there are people who do not have the capability to give of self to another. A bit cynical, you say? Perhaps, but I found that once I learned this very harsh lesson; things became much easier to bear.

Now, I am by no means telling others not to love. In fact, there are some people that would absolutely burst if they couldn't allow love to flow freely. I am simply saying that true love is something that must be given freely without expecting a response in return. Love is like a gift. Sometimes it is returned and, at other times, it is simply "returned". That type of "returned" can often be very painful. Perhaps that is why God made a priority "Love your neighbor as yourself!" The "Love" that I am speaking of is an unselfish love that is not for self gain. It is not meant to change, to entrap, to convince, or to alter. For years, I thought that love was a hold on tight type of deal. In my later years, I am just beginning to know what the meaning of real love is. Real love, the kind that we are called to give, is a selfless love.

And so, when we love, it is often a means to an end that we have in our minds. Let me love you enough so that you will love me in return. Or, let me love you through the hard times and make you feel better. I've done that, we all have. How many marriages are began with one partner hoping to change the other? How many times do we truly love just for Love's sake? It may take a lifetime to learn what the Bible teaches us. "A new commandment I give unto you, that ye love one another; as I have loved you, that ye also love one another." John 13:34 KJV

There's no place like HOME...

You have to be buzzed in, but once you enter the inner sanctum, you realize that you have entered a special place. I go there often; although it was difficult at first. Facing old age can be challenging at best. Health issues, insurmountable financial bills, lost spouses, friends and love ones; these are the very real challenges that our generation's parents face today. So when my mother-in-law took up residence at an appropriate Assisted Living Center that specializes in Alzheimer's disease, it seemed a difficult chore to visit her. I must admit that it wasn't my favorite thing to do. Facing one's own mortality is never easy. But I did it because I loved her. Little did I know that this place would turn into one of my favorite places to visit.

Admittedly, I expected the worse; even though her sons had looked for the best that her long saved, hard earned money, could afford. I was greatly relieved to see that she had her own room. A spacious, private room that could accommodate her very own bed, her favorite chair, a TV, plenty of closet space, access to home cooked meals, desired company with folks her own age and medical care if needed. It wasn't anything like the word Nursing Home had implied in my mind. I had been to many a Nursing Home in my work in the Social Services Agencies; and so, I had seen the places people are placed to spend their last years. I had witnessed the overcrowded facilities, the illnesses, the lack of caring staff and, yes, I'd even smelled the stench. "Believe me!" This homelike facility was the furthest thing from those horrendous places! I thought that she would love it. The place looked almost "resort like" to me. Close by to her family, picturesque window views,three hearty meals served with cloth napkins in the beautifully decorated dining room, snacks, activities, age appropriate music playing in the sitting rooms, even bus trips on occasion. I just couldn't understand why my mother-in-law was so unhappy. She hated the place with a passion! Perhaps it wouldn't have mattered where she "lived". At times, she will even speak French and no one understands her. This is extremely irritating to her because she may want something very badly and not be able to convey her needs.

Although she wants to be "home", my mother-in-law seems to be oblivious to the fact that the place she lives in is as close to "home" as she will ever be again. Once you enter the facility, you realize that the staff that you see bustling around are well versed in elder care. From director to aide; the people that are employed here have busy hands and kind hearts. When I first began visiting, I noticed a cheerfulness that permeated the hallways. Each aide had his/her "people" to tend to.
Their whole purpose was to see to it that these individuals were dressed, fed, kept warm, physically clean and reasonably happy. Not a task to be taken lightly because, as I soon discovered, Alzheimer's Disease is totally different than just dementia.
I realize that when people age, they lose control of certain bodily functions. What I didn't know, is that they may also lose their ability to remember how to do simple tasks. Feeding oneself, communicating, toileting, and even recognizing loved ones are can be challeging. It takes patience & persistence as the staff answer the same questions repetitively. It is even more challenging when the older residents are living in a foreign world of their own.

Each day could be the same, if not for the staff who give their all to make life at the "home" pleasurable for the residents. Many a day, I have walked in there to hear "Here, Mr. B, let's put on dry clothes and then you'll feel much better." Or, seen the younger aides dancing with several of the residents to a song from the 40's.
From the cleaning personnel who keep the place shining and the smell sweet, to the aides who feed mouths that have forgotten how to chew or how to use eating utensils as tools to alliviate hunger. These people are serving with willing hearts of compassion. It is indeed humbling to see these Angels of Mercy who are paid minimum wage, do their work with diligence and dependability. It is reassuring to know as one ages that someone just like them will care how you are cared for.

TAKING IT TO THE STREET!

Sometimes you just have to see for yourself. Now, I'm not the type that enjoys roughing it by any means; but if you're going to write about something, you've got to get in there and really experience it first-hand. Now that ROLLINGAROUND IN THE LIGHT OF THE SON is presently being published as I type; It's time to start my next book. After all, I told you, I don't let grass grow under my wheels! Therefore, OUT OF THE DARKNESS has just been conceived. Due to my fascination with the lives of the homeless; this next writing period of my life has been dedicated to breaking down stereotypes, myths and misunderstandings of the Homeless.

Most of my friends and avid readers are already aware that I've begun doing some research. Yes, I've taken it to the streets on several occasions. I feel like the "Are you crazy!" and "What were you thinking?" statements have died down some and I can start gearing up for my next hands-on experience. I almost feel like I need to put a little footnote here *** No animals or persons were injured in this experience. I assure you that at all times, I am safe and never in any immediate danger. Sleeping in a one-man tent under the stars is actually breathtaking!

I remembering catching just a few hours of sleep the night before Taking it to the Streets. Apprehensive, excited and a bit intimidated by the prospect of the adventure that lie ahead of me; I couldn't wait to get out there. Blanket..check, sleeping bag...check, medications...check, clothes; worn and tattered; I was set to go. So after a nutritious breakfast, my husband dropped me off with my friend, Steven, to begin research on my next project. I was more than ready. Picking up the trailered bike, placing the dog in her safe spot; we were off. Off to the bicycle path to pray!

THE CARNIVAL IS IN TOWN!

They arrived on Wednesday! No, I'm not talking about my daughter and the three boys. Although they did arrive last Sunday, bag and baggage. I'm actually talking about the annual carnival that arrives and sets up across the street for the Community Days here in Elwood. This is our 18Th Elwood Community Days and the occasion has grown from a one-night Street Dance to a three day event. There's a carnival that runs three nights/two days, entertainment, lots of food and a craft show. Activities galore for young and old; everybody and their brother shows up to dance, play bingo, and mingle. The adults like the beer garden and the kids love the rides. Even a parade will step off the main street on Saturday morning at 10 A.M. and a big fireworks show at 9 on Saturday evening. Com'on down! There's always an extra sleeping bag.

There have been moments this week when I actually felt like I lived in a carnival or at least a zoo. With three dogs (Even Steve's dog), two cats, three youngsters, and two extra adults, I have been in heaven. Lots of laughter, activity and "Yes!" it does keep me very busy indeed. I've been having the time of my life! Everyone knows how I love my household bursting at the seams. I mentally picture our home with kids, animals, and people tumbling out of windows and looking as if it was lit up like a Christmas Tree.

Talking about having a full house; it makes my alone time very special to me. So this morning while walking my dog, Cory, I decided to walk past the carnival to see how things were going. It starts at 5 P.M. today; so even though I knew the "Carnies" had been here for a few days now; it's been raining cats & dogs for two days. (Hmmm, maybe that's where all the animals have come from!) They were scrambling around putting up the rides and trying to dry things out. One big, burly man looked over at me and smiled while some of the others waved. They were scurrying from their mobile homes and I even noticed some tents set up by the pond.

Hard life, I thought. I would venture to guess that Carnival life is probably not high on career choices. Always on the go, never being at home and probably not much pay; these people that travel together remind me of the song Cher sings; "Gypsies, Tramps & Thieves". They probably become a family and care for each other.

As I walked on I noticed that they all looked typically alike; kind of tattered, torn and worn. They were working hard to make up for lost time. Tonight the Village of Elwood would come expecting a good time. Food that was edible, rides that were safe and these misfits ready to show the children of our Village a good time...while staying discreet & invisible. "Yes", big, burly man, do your heavy work even in the pouring rain. Come into the Village and provide the entertainment for those I love. Just don't come onto main street to mingle in our midst. Don't rub elbows with me in the Children's Garden or eat in our restaurant. Know your place!"

After the week-end is over, do everything in reverse. Quickly, quietly and even over night, if possible. Move on to the next town where your brightly lit rides will thrill their teens and your funnel cakes will fill every age with delight. Just go!

A TIME OF TRANSITION.

It was a lonely walk down the path this afternoon. Cory and I decided to take our afternoon stroll between the rain showers. It had been raining quite heavily and there were puddles to roll through. The dampness suggested a light fall jacket was in order, but the air was still humid. It's kind of a transitional time. You know, the summer is almost over, it's time to cover up the pool and start gathering things up. Even nature has peeked and it is starting to turn brown and pull back from the light of the sun. As we walked, I even noticed some of the leaves turning already. Kind of melancholy, that's how I felt and as we walked next to the pond there were no fishermen, no Village Workers cutting grass, or little ones playing in the park.

Soon our walks will be brief and hurried. The dampness often gets to my bones and I won't linger at our favorite stops. The sun will have to turn into the Light of the Son to keep me content and calm. I've got lots to keep me busy these next six months. God willing, my book will sell enough copies to make a difference in some peoples' lives. Kerry will get back on her feet and the boys will thrive. I'm going to be vacationing in Florida for awhile after the holidays and I'm looking forward to writing another book.

I often feel like I am going through a transitional period. Everyday brings changes and new opportunities. Besides new aches and pains, I often feel like there are so many possibilities that could take place. It's like you just know something big is going to happen, you just don't know what. BUT You know that you know! These periods of waiting on the Lord can be just as trying as going through a valley.

Rollingaround in the Light of the Son is a never ending process. Whatever the season of the year or the season of life I am indeed thankful that His Light bathes my path in goodness and blessings. Help me, Lord, to realize that just around the bend is a new and better opportunity to serve You.

And it's still raining....